


Home to You

by barrisscoffees



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars: Princess Leia (Comics)
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2017-08-19
Packaged: 2018-12-17 12:22:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11851482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barrisscoffees/pseuds/barrisscoffees
Summary: Evaan lost everything when Alderaan was destroyed - taken from her. More than the possessions, more than the tree in her mother's garden, more than the memories she could no longer make, Evaan lost a home. Those weren't particularly easy to find these days.





	Home to You

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Star Wars Femslash Week Day Seven!!!
> 
> (lmao sorry for the random tense change)

_Ice Princess._ Evaan thought bitterly. Princess Organa might be owed Evaan’s deference, but she certainly did not have Evaan’s respect. The absolute _gall_ it took to treat her - their - planet’s destruction as if it simply were just a shame rather than the indescribable horror that it was. _Family and friends evaporated and she still smiles._

That was, of course, the exact line of thought that lead Evaan to chew out her _Royal Highness_ to her face. The princess seemed more annoyed than angry, though. But _still_ Evaan could not manage to understand how the kind, wonderful, wise Queen Breha could raise such a spoiled brat - one who apparently didn’t even love her own parents. How on Alderaan (Evaan’s heart skipped a beat) would she survive in close quarters with the girl?

////

The Princess, as it turned out, wasn’t quite as bad as Evaan had first thought. It occurred to her, watching the Princess, that maybe the thing that kept Leia from feeling - or at the very least from expressing - grief was _guilt_.

“I’m sorry father… for failing you.” The words, spoken when her Majesty didn’t know she was listening, haunted Evaan. They were so _sincere_ , but that wasn’t it. It was something that Evaan couldn’t quite put her finger on. It was… that she was… wrong. Leia’s father might be dead, she might not be able to save every Alderaanian refugee, but _failure_ was not a word that came to mind to describe Leia Organa - the woman who, for better or worse, instrumental in the destruction of the Death Star, one of the most powerful women in the rebellion. Brave, yes, but failure? Never, no.

Maybe she would tell Princess Organa one day.

////

She and Leia indulged in a drink one night. Between the stress of a maybe traitor and the exhaustion of non-stop travel, Evaan was of the opinion that they deserved it. But the Princess was revealing herself to be more than just a cold leader - she was actually pretty funny. Evaan in particular liked the story of how the Princess, as a child, accidentally dyed half her mother’s hair pink, particularly because Evaan vividly remembered the regal Queen Breha Organa sweeping into a lesson with neon pink hair.

Evaan, then, wasn’t quite sure what made her act so rashly: her Highness’s laugh or the alcohol (Evaan pretended it was the latter, though objectively it must have been both).

“Why were you so cold at the medal ceremony? Why did you say so little of Alderaan?” Evaan asked. Leia, previously lounging comfortably next to her, stiffened visibly and drew herself into a what Evaan assumed to be a defensive posture. Evaan watched Leia’s delicate fingers trace the rim of her glass.

“I was taught,” she began, quietly, “that a Princess must be _strong_ for her people. I know it can mean many things, but I’d rather be seen as cold than weak. It is more than Alderaan, now. The rebellion needs me. I cannot afford to break down.”

_It must be hard_ , Evaan wished she could say, _having the weight of a galaxy on your shoulders._ Instead she said: “You don’t have to be alone.”

Her Majesty smiled, slightly.

“Funny. Luke told me much the same thing.” The warm smile, the quiet comfort, Evaan realized maybe she was defrosting a bit too.

////

The first time her _Queen_ (effectively as Leia was the ruler of the Alderaan’s in her mother’s absence) asked her to spar, Evaan had been so mortified and so terrified of hurting her that Leia defeated her handily. It was certainly a blow to Evaan’s pride, but she knew better now.

Leia had her pinned to the wall after a frankly _beautifully_ executed feint, but Evaan still managed to wriggle her arm free. She slammed the butt of her palm between Leia’s eyes, just above her nose. Leia stumbled back, disoriented, and Evaan took advantage, grabbing her shoulders and sweeping her foot under Leia’s. She tumbled to the ground, but managed to catch herself on her elbows, she was still somewhat resting on them when Evaan designed to bring her foot down on Leia’s ribcage.

Faster than Evaan had expected, Leia had dropped fully onto her back, freeing up her arms and catching Evaan’s foot just a few inches above her chest. Evaan was momentarily stunned; Leia smirked. She twisted Evaan’s foot and easily knocked her other out of place. Evaan crashed to the floor, wind knocked out of her.

While Evaan lay on her back, mouth opening and closing without taking in any actual air, Leia shot to her feet and rested her heel against Evaan’s trachea. And movement by Evaan in a real fight would have ended in a crushed throat and (likely shortly afterwards) death. Evaan slapped her hand on the mat, and Leia moved off her and pulled her to her feet in one fluid movement. She rubbed her hand over Evaan’s back, patting slightly until Evaan started to really breathe again. Evaan waved her off.

“I’m good, Princess.” Leia stilled.

“Evaan, may I ask something of you?” Busy retrieving her water, Evaan paused.

“Of course.” Leia drew her hands together and rose to a regal pose.

“Would you please not call me that? ‘Princess,’ I mean.” She held her hand up, ceasing to protests gathering in Evaan’s throat, “I know what you have to say about tradition, but all it does is remind me of what I have lost.” For once, Evaan was struck speechless; she inched closer and put her hands over the princess’s twitching ones.

“Of course, Leia.”

////

The moment Evaan realizes she is well and truly screwed is the first time Leia kisses her. It’s only on the cheek - a victory peck - but for hours after Evaan’s cheek tingles and for days after she walks around in a slight daze. She dreams of pulling the royal close, dreams of leaving her own lingering kisses on Leia’s lips and neck. When she’s awake, Evaan can’t tear her eyes off Leia - the curve of her waist, the coil of her fingers, the curl of her smile. It is, to Evaan, intoxicating.

It starts like that: small. They exchange kisses on the cheek and pass furtive glances across the ship. Evaan isn’t one to label things, but she can’t help but wonder if she is dating or just flirting with her former princess.

////

Evaan is the first to slip up. Which, all in all, isn’t surprising. She says _girlfriend_ , to a source, as in: ‘this is my _girlfriend_ Leia.’ Evaan panics inwardly, but she swears she sees Leia smile from under her hood before the neutral mask snaps back into place.

After that, Leia calls Evaan her girlfriend casually on many occasions; Evaan nearly falls over every time. However fun their game is, Evaan still thinks they need to talk, and she’s sure Leia feels the same.

////

“Why me?” She asks Leia. They are alone by Evaan’s design, but it’s late and Leia is tired. She won’t look Evaan in the eye. “Leia? I can start. I like you because you are smart and kind and selfless. I am constantly amazed by you.” Leia ducked her head; Evaan pulled her closer and tilted Leia’s chin up to look her in the eye. The princess lays her head on Evaan’s shoulder, so Evaan wraps her arms around the smaller woman.

“When I’m with you…” Leia begins, her voice hushed, “it’s like coming home. It’s like I can’t share my grief with anybody but you. Who other than an Alderaanian could empathize with the magnitude of grief. I feel at peace with you. When I am with you, it is as if Alderaan doesn’t have to be gone. It is as if I can finally be happy.”

It strikes Evaan in that moment, that she hasn’t had nightmares about Alderaan being destroyed in weeks. They can’t ever go back, Alderaan will never be her home again, but pulled close to this shining beacon of light in her life, Evaan can’t help but agree: she’s home.

**Author's Note:**

> It's certainly been a trip. :')
> 
> (Have you noticed this is basically the same as my other story? Well me too.)
> 
> THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO READ MY STUFF AND PARTICULARLY [LUMINOUSSBEINGS](http://archiveofourown.org/users/luminoussbeings) FOR ARRANGING THIS WHOLE THING.
> 
> Anyways, thanks to all who review or leave kudos, you're the best!  
> Much love to thedorkyastra, and thanks to Edith, my good friend, my buddy, my homie.  
> Constructive criticism is always welcome!
> 
> Find me on [tumblr](http://barrisscoffees.tumblr.com/)!!!!


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